Blinded
by pluto-mint
Summary: Updated! Seishirou always gets what he wants no matter what, Subaru is confused. Fluffy with a healthy dose of angst. AU. FK, FuumaSubaru, SS etc. R&R please!
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: X and related characters belong to Clamp. Not me.

Blinded

An X/1999 Fanfic by pluto-mint

Summary: Fuuma is confused about his feelings to a certain someone. AU X story with no end of the world issue. F/K/K and Fuuma/Subaru (?) in later chapters

__

Blinded 

**Prologue**

****

_I am never much a dreamer. I don't believe in hope, I don't believe in wishes, and of course I never believe in dreams. My sister said that dreams are made to be real. Dreams are the things that you will keep on chasing in your entire life. You should believe in dreams. For nothing really matters to you anymore when you finally had it in your hands._

_But like I've said before I never believe in dreams._

_Dreams will only hurt you in the end. Because no matter how much you believe that the dreams will come true, in the end the dreams will only exists in your sleep. Why would you want to hurt yourself? That's why I never believe in dreams._

***

"Kotori, did you bring your lunch box?"

"I got it in my bag, Oniichan"

"What about the pills? You didn't forget to bring it didn't you?"

"Oniichan, please stop being a mother hen. I'm not an eight year old anymore."

"I know. But I just can't help it."

My name is Monou Fuuma and the girl to whom I talk to is my younger and only sister. Her name is Kotori. Our parents had died few years ago so that explains why I'm acting like a mother hen to her. I also happen to be a bit over protective to her. Well, that's what she said anyway.

This morning, as usual, we go to our school together. She's always cheerful in the morning. But today her golden hair shines brighter than usual and her eyes seem to glow with more happiness. Maybe she had a wonderful dream last night. I can't help but wonder what it is.

The school was already crowded with students when we got there. It's kind of hard to find a parking lot for my bike. When I finally found the perfect place, I feel a hand tugging at my shirt. It was Kotori's hand of course.

"What is it Kotori?"

"Oniichan," she smiled to me with her wonderful smile, "I had a wonderful dream last night."

_Yep. My guess was right._

"I dream about Kamui. In my dream I saw him coming back to Tokyo and stay with us. Isn't it wonderful Oniichan?"

Kamui.

The name somehow makes my heart beat a little bit faster. And I don't know why.

"Kotori, Kamui had already left Tokyo nine years ago," ah the sudden leave, I always hate to remember that part, "but then again it's your dream we're talking about so I think there's a chance for his returning to Tokyo." 

"You don't believe in dreams do you Oniichan?"

_Now she knows my secret._

"Maybe. But one can still hope, can he?" I try to assure her with my smile.

"Of course he can, but why is it so hard for you to believe in dreams? That's the only thing I hate from you Oniichan." 

Kotori never got angry with me. But when I make some mistakes she always looks so sad. And right now I can see sadness dawn into her eyes. In the end of the day I'm sure I will end up hating myself for making her sad.

"Kotori, I'm sorry. Tell you what I'll cook the dinner for you okay? Now wipe that look off your face or Kamui will never recognize you." It's always nice to tease her around.

"What's wrong with my face?" As clueless as ever that's my sister Kotori.

"Nothing's wrong with your face. You are beautiful. And I will pick you up after I clean up the dojo okay? It's my turn this week. Besides I don't want to make Arashi fuming at me."

"Okay. Say hi to Arashi chan for me"

I try so hard not to blush when she kissed my cheek.

***

Arashi and I had become best friends since our first year. She's my classmates and also my best friend at the kendo club. When I was elected as the kaichuo at the kendo club, she became the secretary. We are so close there's even talk about us being a couple. Which is kind of ridiculous, I think. Because no matter how close we are, we could never be lovers. She doesn't love me and vice versa. We are simply best friends for life.

I don't love her. But I think it's not so hard to understand why it's so easy for a guy to fall in love with her. She's the woman that could define 'Japan's classic beauty', long and silky black hair combined with a marvelous alabaster skin and a body shape that could show the gracefulness inside her. Let's not forget about a pair of piercing eyes that could see your deepest desire.

And…I think those eyes are staring at me right now.

"Fuuma, don't just stand there! Give me a hand will you."

Damn, but those eyes can be scary sometimes.

"Arashi.., I need to pick Kotori right now. Besides I've already finish my job sweeping the floor."

"Always the over protective brother are you? She's 16 this year Fuuma. You should give her more rooms for herself you know."

"Shut up" 

"Ne Fuuma, why did you look so happy today? Did something good happen last night?"

"Did I? Nothing special I guess, but there's a dream that I've been thinking of a whole day"

"A dream huh? I wonder what it's about," there's a mischievous smile on her face, I hate that, "sooo did you have a good time in your dream?"

DON'T BLUSH! DON'T BLUSH! DON'T BLUSH! DON'T BLUSH!

Hah! I think that works. But still I can feel my cheek is tinted with a faint pink shade right now. Arashi always loves to tease me around. Sometimes I can be as red as tomato when she teases me. Thank god she didn't do it in public or I'll lose my 'cold' reputation.

"Sorry to disappoint your hentai thoughts but it's nothing like that." I can't stop myself from grinning at her. Well what do you know? Apparently our ice princess is having hentai thoughts too sometimes.

"Well, I'm all ears you know.."

"I'll tell you later ok? Can't let Kotori wait too long."

She only answers me with a huff and something sounds like "jerk" under her breath.

***

As much as I trust Arashi as my best friend, I never told her about Kamui. What would I say to her any way? That he's my child hood friends, Kotori's fiancé, or maybe my first crush? I don't think I'm able to say those things to her. Well, at least not with her teasing me about it.

_Kamui is.. _

Hell. I don't even know who Kamui is to me. I can't even term my feelings to him. All I can remember is the pain, the loneliness, and the sweetness left from a golden afternoon where we played on the temple's backyard. 

I remember his violet eyes that could shine so bright they could melt an ice. I remember the happiness I've felt every time I heard him laughing at nothing special, or the shy smile he gave me every time he saw me secretly watching his every move. But I also remember the loneliness and the betrayed feeling I have every time I remember his goodbye wave.

What is this feeling? So painful and yet so blissfully blessed.

***

I didn't see any sign of Kotori in the parking lot. My heart starts to get worry. I run to the school backyard hoping to find her sitting under a tree with a book in her hands. 

_Lord, please let her be okay. _

When I get there I see her long golden hair waved around by a gust of wind. I can hear her laughter. Thank God she's okay.

But who's with her? They better be nice to her or I'll..

All I can see is the person's back. A boy, with silky black hair, just a little bit taller than her, is talking and laughing with her. 

"Kotori!"

"Oniichan"

The boy turns his face at me so I can see his eyes.

Violet.

"Fuuma."

.. K a m u i..

***

_I am never much a dreamer. I don't believe in hope, I don't believe in wishes, and of course I never believe in dreams._

_But that doesn't mean that I don't dream._

_I dreamed of Kamui sometimes._

A/N: So.. how was it? Please let me know if you like it or hate it. And please don't be so mean to me.. this is my first fanfic anyway.

Review please! Thank you! ^-^


	2. Blinded: Chapter 1

Disclaimer: X and related characters belong to CLAMP, not me. They're not mine.

**Blinded**

An X fanfiction by Pluto-mint

Summary: Fuuma's confused about his feelings to a certain someone named Kamui. AU X universe.

Pairings: F/K/K, Fuuma/Subaru, Seishirou/Subaru (in later chapters)

Warning: This fic featured a goody-goody Fuuma, but don't worry I will put the Dark Kamui personality in later chapters. Bad grammar, a really bad one. And..oh yeah shounen ai of course.

_Blinded_

**Chapter 1**

Blue.

That's what he first saw in the morning. The blue shades of the morning sky. Blue. Not white, the color of his ceiling, as it used to be in every other morning.

The warmth of the morning light touched his skin. The cool morning breeze caressed his face like a lover's touch. In an instant he felt truly blessed.

A smile grows on his lips as he hugs his pillow closer. This is a rare moment in his life, in which he woke up with a blessed feeling filled his heart.

***

Kotori's giggle filled the shrine's yard.  She was telling her brother, Fuuma , about the girls who often squealed every time they took a glance on Kamui. Kamui only blushed in returns, though his face showed how much the situation annoyed him. Fuuma smiled slightly as he reminisce the same feeling he had in his childhood days.

They're always together. Playing, laughing, and dreaming together, always. Kotori would lead them with her cheerful nature. And they'd follow her. It was as if Kotori was their guide. Kamui would watch Kotori with a loving smile in his face while Fuuma's always be the one who would watch them from afar. And he would stay behind to protect them from anything. Sometimes Kotori noticed this and took his hands so he could join them. And he was happy.

Happy as he should be right now. It's been six year since their separation and now they're together. Though they're not kids anymore but nothing really changed. Well, not physically anyway. Kamui had grown into a handsome teenage boy with a slightly effeminate look that only made him look more attractive. Kotori is still as beautiful as ever. She's just a girl now but soon she would become a beautiful young lady. And him, he didn't really feel that he's changed. Sure he became taller and stronger but he never realized that. Not until Kamui remark how tall he is compared to Kamui's delicate form.

To see the smile of the two people he loved most gives him a warm feeling inside his heart. Every thing's okay as long as they're happy.

Kotori's chatter light up the day as they're making their way to the school. He never brought his bike again since Kamui join their daily walk to the school. The sky is bright. The air is fresh. And the two people he loved most are happy. Every thing is perfect for him.

***

The school library is not as crowded as usual. Monou Fuuma sat in a chair nearby the window, biting the end of his pencil. He's deep in thought. A frown is on his face. And his eyebrow is nearly connected to each other. Some English literature books were sprawled in the table. The sunlight illuminates his handsome face as he's thinking the next line of his English paper.

Kishuu Arashi is taking the seat in front of him. She's in the library for the same reason with him, but instead of doing her own English paper, her eyes are silently observing her best friend's feature. 

Fuuma was always known for his cool and composed nature. Other students even acknowledge him for his strength and his 'possessive brother' image. But Arashi knows better than that. Some times beyond the cool surface she could see a boy, sad and lonely. It's very rare to find a happy smile plastered on her best friends face. That's why she can't help but wonder why lately she always found a glimpse of happiness in her best friend's usually empty gaze.

"Fuuma?"

"Hn?"

"Who is he?"

"He?"

"Yeah. Him. You know…the boy who's always around Kotori lately.."

For a while Arashi swore she could see something flicker on Fuuma's honey colored eyes. This boy must be really someone dear to Fuuma judging from the attention she gets from the question.

"Oh. His name is Shirou Kamui. His mother's just passed away two weeks ago and now he's living in Tokyo with his aunt Magami Tokiko. We, I mean Kamui, Kotori and I, are childhood friends." 

_A childhood friend?_

"Really? But Kotori seems so close with him and you don't seem to mind either. It makes me wonder about something. Fuuma..are they lovers?"

***

_"…Are they lovers?"_

Arashi's words startle him in the first place.

_Lovers? Kotori and Kamui… _

He never thought about it. But that doesn't seem so impossible right?

Suddenly he felt there's a knot inside his heart. Why does it feel so hard to breathe?

He always knows that Kotori always liked Kamui the way a girl likes a boy. They even made a vow to be each others bride when they're still kids. But what about Kamui's feeling? Does Kamui love her? Maybe he does. They could be happy together. They would be perfect for each other. And if the two persons he loved most are happy then he should be happy as well, right? 

But then why does it hurt so bad just to think about it. 

"...I don't know"

And that's the truth, because he really doesn't know what to say, what to think, and what to feel.

He look passed the window. There's a heavy cloud coming. It covers the sun and turns the blue sky into a grayish shade of stormy sky.

A raging storm is coming.

***

In an empty classroom, two persons are watching the rain silently. The first one is a boy with a pair of deep violet eyes. He was watching the other person back with a gentle expression. And the other person, a girl, is standing near the foggy window with a sad expression in her face.

Kotori's watching the raindrops fall heavily on the school yard. The rain's slowly turn into a fit storm now. A silver lining is seen beyond the stormy skies. The thunder is coming. Her body shakes a little. She always hates the sounds of the thunder. It always reminds her the night when her mother passed away.

She remembered how the sadness of her mother death nearly broke her. If it wasn't for her brother strength she might never passed those bitter years. Fuuma is always there when she need him. And oh how she long for her brother arms in times like these..

"Kotori, are you alright?"

Kamui's soft voice brought her back to the reality. Kamui's eyes filled with worry and concern. She hates to see that two emotions tinted the violet shade of his eyes. 

"Aa. I'm alright..It's just that..I hate the sounds of the thunder. It brings back some painful memories. I wish that Oniichan is here."

There's a hint of sadness in her soft voice. 

"That's okay. You don't have to be afraid anymore. I.. I'm here with you. I will protect you, you know."

Kamui blushes as he spokes those words. He doesn't know what makes him says those words to Kotori. But to see Kotori sad and broken is too much for him. Besides he really wanted to protect her. He had known for quite a long time that he's keeping a crush to Kotori. It's just a childhood crush but the feeling's getting stronger since their meeting last week.

"Thank you, Kamui-chan. It's very sweet. I really appreciate it."

Kamui is not the only one with a red face in the room because Kotori's face is dusted with faint shade of pink. He wonders if this means that Kotori likes him too. Hesitantly he slips his fingers into Kotori's small and delicate fingers. 

"It's alright. I'm here with you." He smiled tenderly.

At first Kotori looks mildly surprised but then she whispers softly, "Thank you."

***

Behind the slightly opened door a pair of golden eyes is watching sadly. The couple seems happy and content with each other presence. 

_They are happy._

_It hurts._

But then why does it hurt? Why does he found himself isolated from his own happiness? Why does he feel so sad and broken?

_Why?..._

_Why?  _

TBC

A/N: Eeep! Finally! I know.. I know Fuuma is too OOC in this fic and you may find this chapter as a crappy one but I can't help it! I wrote this fic because my mind can't stop wondering how Fuuma and Kamui's relationship would be if there's no end of the world issue. 

Subaru is coming in the next chapter, but I don't have any idea how to put him on the fic. Should I put him as the sad and angsty guy or should I put it as the cute boy next door like in TB? Give me a suggestion please! And for you Sei-chan lovers, don't worry he'll show up in later chapters.  

Yanagi-san: Yes, this is a F/K fic. But the road isn't easy. ^__^ And by the way I love your fic, I'm sorry I haven't review it.

Kaori-san: You dislike Fuuma/Subaru pairing? Well I kinda like them, that's why I put it on the fic. But not to worry, the pairing is only a minor one. Nothing can beat Seishirou/Subaru pairing to me. Umm.. maybe except Akira/Hikaru (HikaGo), Fuuma/Kamui, and Athrun/Kira (Gundam SEED) *grin* 

And the last but not least  I'm sorry for the bad grammar. I don't have a beta reader to edit it. *sniff*

By the way, does anyone know where I can find Gundam SEED's fanfiction archive, especially the Yaoi ones? I'm kinda obsessed with Athrun Zala right now so please..please.. let me know if you do. 

Read and Review please! Thank you! ^o^


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: X and related characters are not mine. They belong to the one and only CLAMP.

Blinded 

X fanfiction by Pluto-mint.

Summary: Fuuma, Kamui, and Kotori are reunited again. New feelings arise. How will they cope this? AU X universe.

Pairings: F/K/K, Fuuma/Subaru, Seishirou/Subaru, and others.

Warning: Shounen ai, fluffy with a healthy dose of angst.

And now on to the new chapter! Lots of  Fuuma/Subaru fluffiness on this chapter. Enjoy! ^__^

Blinded Chapter 2 

"Oniichan… Are you sure you're going to be alright?" Kotori checks his forehead for the third times in the morning, "You know, maybe I'll just skip the school for you and cook you some soup…"

"Kotori, I'm fine. It's nothing serious, it's just a fever. I'll be fine really. Now take this lunch box and leave. Or I- Aaaa---choo!"

"Kotori is right, Fuuma. Maybe you should go to the doctor. Would you like to see Tokiko-san? She's a doctor you know…" Kamui's worry voice matches the look on his face. Fuuma rubbed his temple. Soon Kamui and Kotori will start whining together in order to put him in bed like some sick man he is. 

"Kamui… Kotori…" Fuuma sighs in exasperation, "I just need some sleep that's all. There's nothing to worry about. Why don't you just go to school now and I'll go to my bed and try to get some sleep for myself."

"But-"

"No buts Kotori. You'll be late if you don't go now!"

Kotori still have the stubborn look in her face, but her voice was soft when she says, "Alright… we're leaving, I guess I can ask someone to look after you today and promise me you will get your self some sleep, please?"

"Fuuma…" Kamui's hands touching his arm slightly, pushing him to answer the question with the right answer.

"I promise." And Fuuma smiled warmly to them, "You don't have to be worry about me. Now go. And tell Arashi I'll return her book tomorrow. Okay?"

The two people he loved nod and smile as he waves them good bye.

So much for a morning, he thinks. Got tangled in a fever certainly isn't a good way to start your day. He felt tired but he didn't know why. He rubbed his throbbing headache. In the corner of his mind, he dimly aware that getting soaked in the middle of the storm is not the only cause of his headache. 

Slowly he let himself sink in the couch. The warm ray of sunlight is seeping through the half opened window. He remembered how his mother used to soothe his hair every time he laid his head on his mother's lap. And how she used to whispered the soft rhymes of lullaby. 

So warm and caring. 

The weight on his heart was eased by the slight memories of his childhood days. But the pained feeling he gets every time he saw Kamui's holding her hand is there to stay. Why? He doesn't know why…

Maybe he's just jealous, maybe he's just angry, maybe he's just lonely…

Lonely… 

The thought is slowly fade away as he's drifting off to sleep.

***

Kishuu Arashi is the perfect sample of a morning person. She believes that starting your day earlier will get you bestowed with so many blessings. But that's not the only reasons why she got up so early. The other reason is because she loves the serene feeling she gets from the early morning calmness. 

Fuuma also loves it. Maybe that's why she's not the only person who loves to come early to school. Usually when she enters the classroom in the morning, Fuuma is already there. Sitting silently in the seat near the window and contemplating to whatever is going through his mind.

But today she only found an empty seat.

Something's wrong.

"Kishuu-san, there's a first year who wants to see you. Monou's sister I believe." A boy named Nakamura is calling her and stopping her train of thoughts.

"Aa. Thank you Nakamura-san."

Kotori looks nervous and a bit sad when she greets her good morning. Besides her there's a boy who she believes is Shirou Kamui. Black hair and violet eyes. 

"Anoo… Kotori-chan, what brings you here? And where's Fuuma?"

"Oniichan is not coming to school today. He has fever. Anyway Oniichan said that he'll return your book tomorrow." There's a glint of sadness in her eyes. Her face looks sorrowful. She's really worried about her brother, is she?

"I see… Thanks for the notification Kotori-chan. Is he alright?"

"He said he just got tired. But still it doesn't make me less worry about him, I even call someone to look after him today while I'm in school." Kamui squeezed her shoulder gently supporting her with his strength.

"Don't worry. Fuuma is one of the strongest person I know, I'm sure he'll be fine." Arashi smiled to Kotori while her eyes watching Kamui's feature curiously. Apparently Kotori noticed this and blushed slightly as she introduced the boy to her. 

"Arashi-chan, this is Shirou Kamui. Kamui-chan this is Kishuu Arashi. She's Oniichan's best friends and also the secretary of the Kendo club along with Oniichan as the Kaichuo."

"It's very nice to meet you Shirou-san." She bowed her head as she introduced herself.

"The pleasure is mine, Kishuu-san." The boy smiled shyly to her and looked very cute with a blush on his cheeks. She was about to ask him a question when the bell rang.

"We better get going now Arashi-chan. I'm sorry to bother you with the news."

"No it's okay. Tell Fuuma to get some rest okay?"

Kotori nods slightly as she turns her back and followed by Kamui's back. The boy smiled to her as he took Kotori's hands in order not to make them late for class.

***

"Hmm…"

He purrs in contentment as he feels soft and tender fingers stroking his hair lightly. Warm breath is tickling his face. This is nice. A gentle hand is slowly rubbing his temple to ease his throbbing headache.

"Fuuma…Fuuma…are you alright?"

Subaru's soft voice awakes all his senses. A sigh is escaping from his lips. "Subaru…" Slowly he opens his eyes only to find emerald orbs watching him intently. Subaru's face is only few inches away from his own face. He can't help but to smile to see how a blush is slowly creeping Subaru's adorable face. It's amazing how someone who's three years older than him manage to look as cute as an early teen boy.

"I…I'm sorry to wake you up. But you keep on writhing on your sleep, I thought you might have a nightmare." The other boy is half stuttered as he spoke those words. His hands abruptly stopped and start to twist the fabric of his olive green shirt in a nervous gesture. 

"Nah. 's okay. Just don't stop your hands now…" Subaru's touch is too much to be ignored by his throbbing headache. The two boys smiled and silently enjoying each other's company.

After a few minutes of peaceful silence, Fuuma is finally become the first one to spoke.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you here? I thought you're supposed to be in Kyoto for the next few days."

"Well…let's just say that I manage to convince my grand mother how much I missed you." Subaru smiled slightly. The older boy is sitting on the floor (since Fuuma's frame is taking the whole couch), propping one of his elbow in the couch and leaning into it while his other hands is gently massaging Fuuma's temple.

"Liar." Fuuma's chuckling affectionately. "Kotori must have called you. I'm sorry to bother you."

"You're having a fever. Besides it's not like I flew straight away from Kyoto when I heard that you're sick. Actually I've been in Tokyo for two days and I've called you last night but Kotori said that you're asleep. And yes, Kotori did call me this morning asking me to look after you. And you are so careless for letting the door unlocked while you fall asleep on the couch." 

"You're such a mother hen, you know."

"It takes one to know one, they said. Are you going to stay like this for the rest of the day? I certainly hope not because my hands are getting numb, you know." Even with a frown on his face, Subaru is always managed to look as innocent as ever.

"I wish. But it's already passed the lunch time and my stomach is growling with protest." Fuuma shrugged and lazily stretching his limb like a cat. A big cat. 

"Do you want something to eat? I can make something for you." Ask Fuuma as he's heading the kitchen.

"Oh, don't worry about lunch. I already brought you some Chinese take outs. We just have to put in on the microwave to make it warm again."

"Why, thank you Subaru-kun." A grin is plastered in Fuuma's face.

"Stop calling me like that. I'm older than you remember?" It's true that Subaru is three year older than Fuuma. But he's taller and stronger than Subaru and Subaru can be so cute sometimes. That's why he loves to tease Subaru by showing him how cute he is.

"Besides I hate that…" Subaru's voice is barely a whisper, but Fuuma noticed the sad tone in the other boy's voice.

"If you want me to, I'll do it for you…" Fuuma leaned to the smaller boy and whispered seductively, "Subaru-chan…"

Subaru is giving him a death glare and start to chase him around the house.

***

"It's almost dinner time. I wonder why Kotori-chan is late?" Subaru said as he's watching the evening sky through the kitchen window. The night is still young, there's only one or two stars in the sky. He was helping Fuuma preparing the dinner. Fuuma is chopping the onion while Subaru is stirring the half boiled soup.

"Hn. Maybe she has something to do." _Like a date with Kamui maybe._ There… there… why did he feel the same pained feeling again?

"You're not worried?" Subaru asks in amazement. "Funny. You used to pacing around the house even if Kotori is late for only five minutes."

"Not really. I believe that now there's someone who will always protect her."

"You mean like a boy friend…? The boy must be really something to you. Wonder how he managed to melt your walls."

Yeah. Kamui is really something to him. More like an enigma to him because he doesn't really know how he feels toward the boy.

"Fuuma…You're blushing" Subaru exclaimed it by pointing his fingers to Fuuma's cheek. 

He felt that his face is burning.

"Shut up. Just keep on stirring the soup, Subaru-chan…"

"I'm not a girl and I'm older than you…" Subaru grumbled under his breath.

But Subaru is right. Just thinking about Kamui can make his heart skip a beat. For the past few weeks he felt as if  Kamui is the center of his universe. All the things he said, all the things he thought, and all the things he felt lately must involve Kamui in a certain degree. Besides, the feelings he gets every time he saw Kamui holding his sister's hands must indicate something. Could it be jealousy? Could it be… love?

What if he fell in love with Kamui? But Kotori loved him. And Kamui might love her too. What would he do? He never thought about it. 

_It hurts._

"Fuuma… you're crying." Subaru's concern voice brought him back to reality.

"Damn. Must be the onion." Abruptly he tried to wipe the tears away but Subaru's gentle hand stop him. 

"You're so careless sometimes." Subaru sighed and reach for the tissue box in the table. Gently Subaru wipes his tears away with a tissue. Subaru leans closer to him and pulling his face gently with his hands. He whispers,

"Let me see your eyes." 

***

 "Kawaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!"

Kotori's squealing voice snap the two boys from their 'tender and loving' moment, or so Kotori's thought it was. Fuuma's eyes widened while Subaru is abruptly taking his hands off Fuuma's face.

"Oniichan! Subaru-san! You look like a newly wed couple! Aren't they cute Kamui-chan?" Kotori turns her face to a very blushing Kamui behind her.

_Damn! What would Kamui think about this?_ Fuuma is cursing silently.

Both him and Subaru are also blushing real hard. Amazingly although his face is nearly as red as a tomato, Subaru managed to find his voice.

"Er… It's nothing like that Kotori-chan. We were just-" 

"The soup is boiling!" Fuuma quickly exclaimed by pointing at the stove to distract Kotori's attention. Thankfully it works.

But suddenly Kotori glared at him.

"Oniichan! I thought you'd promised me to stay in bed?"

"Er… I did and I'm quite fine now. Thanks for Subaru's treatment."

"Subaru-san, is that true?"

Subaru smiles sweetly and says, "It's true Kotori-chan. I think he's alright now. I made him take the pills." 

"I still don't believe you Oniichan."

"But it's true. We're just preparing the dinner. Right Subaru?" The two siblings turn to Subaru and finding the older boy's observing Kamui's feature intently.

"Oh, Subaru-san this is Shirou Kamui. He's an old friend of ours." Kotori said cheerfully. She pulled the two boys closer and introduced them to each other. 

"A childhood friend actually. He just moved back from Okinawa two weeks ago. Kamui, this is Sumeragi Subaru. We met two years ago at his family's party. He's the son Otousan's friend." Fuuma smiled and added Kotori's explanation with his.

***

Kamui watches the boy before him with amazement. So beautiful, even for a boy. The boy is wearing an olive green shirt that matched his emerald eyes, combined with a half faded hip hugging black jeans. He's a bit taller than Kamui but still small enough if he was being compared to Fuuma's tall and athletic built.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Sumeragi-san." Kamui bowed his head.

"The pleasure is all mine, Shirou-san." Subaru returns the bow and then smiled slightly.

"Now that you know each other, why don't we have dinner together?" Kotori asks them cheerfully. "It would be nice to have dinner together with your friends."

"That would be great Kotori-chan. I'll go help Fuuma cook for the dinner." Subaru smiled and walk closer to Fuuma. "What about you Shirou-san?"

"Okay. Then I'll help you prepare the table Kotori-chan." Kotori nods and smiles to Kamui. Kamui took Kotori's hand and lead her to the dining room. They are such a picture perfect.

"They look so perfect together, aren't they Fuuma?"

Fuuma smiled weakly and said, "Yes they are"

"Fuuma?" Subaru eyed his best friend's face curiously.

"Saa… Let's prepare the dinner Subaru-chan." The weak smile suddenly changed with a mischief grin in Fuuma's face that makes Subaru wants to strangle him.

"Hey! I told you not to call me like that!"

***

"Tadaima"

"Okaerinassai Kamui-san. You're late. Where have you been?" Tokiko's voice sounds curious. She opens the door with a stack of hospital paper in her hands. It looks like she's just reading those papers when Kamui got home.

"I just have dinner with Fuuma, Kotori, and one of their friends. His name is Sumeragi Subaru if I'm not mistaken." Kamui followed Tokiko to her working room.

"Sumeragi Subaru? The only heir of Sumeragi Corp.? That Sumeragi Subaru?" Tokiko asked the boy with a hint of curious in her voice.

"I don't know. He does seem a bit rich. Why did you ask?"

"Because that Sumeragi Subaru has just donating a few billion yen to the hospital. How old is he?"

"Wow! He's only 19 or maybe at his early twenties, I guess"

"Well, if that's the case maybe he is that Sumeragi Subaru. The boy is also 20 this year." Tokiko sat on the couch and start to read the hospital papers again.

"How did you know so much about him?" Kamui asks her curiously.

"A friend told me a lot about him. Do you know anything else about him?"

"Well, all I know is that Subaru is Fuuma's best friend. They seem so close with each other. That's why he came and had dinner with us."

"Really? How close are they? Are they lovers?" Tokiko said nonchalantly, still reading the papers.

"Tokiko-san!" Kamui is blushing, "I don't know. I'm sure Fuuma will let me know if they are."

"You know, you're so cute Kamui-san."  Tokiko start to giggle and ruffle her nephew's hair.

"I'm going to my room. 'yasumi, Tokiko-san." Kamui smiles to her and leans to kiss her good night before he went to the stairs.

***

Later that night when everyone's asleep, Kamui lay awake on his bed, watching his ceiling on his darkened room and thinking about the day.

So many things happen today. Suddenly he was aware of how much they all have changed. Especially Fuuma.

He never thought that Fuuma has other friends besides him. Another life besides the one that he know. 

Fuuma as the Kendo club captain. Fuuma as Subaru's best friend.

There are so many other sides of Fuuma's life that he didn't know. Like how Fuuma is like when he's hanging out with his fellow students, or as a sempai, or as a kaichuo, or maybe as a boyfriend…

He doesn't have a clue.

Suddenly he felt so lonely. They all have grown up so much. Sooner or later he had to let go the Fuuma he used to know.

He felt left behind. 

TBC

A/N:  First of all I want to apologize something to you my dear reader. I'm so sorry for you all anonymous reader and reviewer, I never realize that my fic do not accept any anonymous reviewer. Gomen… gomen…_  

But I already change the setting now, so please please give me your critics and comment please o… I crave for it! Thank you ^o^

**Yanagi-san**: I'm not saying that I will put the Dark Kamui on the fic literally, but I will put some of his … ahem… sensual, possessive, and violent side of him in our dear Fuuma's personality in later chapters. ^__^ And about Kotori, I think we just have to wait and see.

**Yamato-san**: Thank You!!!! I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint you! ^o^ Thank you again for the suggestion!

**Lady Zephiros-san**: You like Fuuma/Subaru too? Ehehehe aren't they look so cute together. I'm sorry I haven't put the angsty Subaru on this chapter but I hope the fluffiness will do you good. But don't worry there **WILL** be a competition between Seishirou and Fuuma. And oh yeah this fic will end up F/K but you just have to wait and see. ^__^ 

So… what do you think about the chapter? Do you think I should continue this fluffiness between Fuuma and Subaru? I really hope that you like it. 

For you F/K shipper, I know there's a lot of fluffy moments between Fuuma and Subaru but for don't worry because on the next chapter Kamui will get some TLC moment as well. But I still need some feedback, so read and review this chapter please! ^_^  

And by the way I still crave for the Gundam SEED's yaoi fanfiction archive! So if you know anything about it, please tell me! Athrun forever!!! Yay!


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: X and related characters belong to CLAMP. They're not mine.

Blinded

An X fanfiction by Pluto-mint

Warning: A bit lime-ish on this part.

Pairings: F/K, S/S, F/Su, Kamui/Kotori?

Ratings: PG-13

Sorry for the long Update minna-san! Enjoy this part! ^__^ Blinded 

Chapter 3 

The dojo was already empty since the practice session is already over. But a boy was still sitting silently in the corner of the room. His long and spiky bangs are covering his perfect golden eye. Through the slightly opened window, an evening breeze is ruffling his already ruffled hair. 

The boy was thinking about another boy. It's always about **that boy. Lately he's been haunted by the shadow of the boy. Violet. That's what he saw every time he closed his eyes. The violet shade of his eyes. Why?**

He sighed for the fourth time in a row. 

_Kamui. Why do I have to feel these feelings for you? What have you done to me Kamui?_

He was so deep in thought he barely heard the footsteps that's coming into his way. Nor did he feel the presence of another person inside the dojo.

             "What's with the long face Fuuma?"

Kishuu Arashi was standing by door way with her long hair tied in a neat pony tail. Her beautiful face shows concern and genuine sadness. She was still wearing her hakama just like the boy who was sitting silently inside the dojo.

"Arashi."

Why does he find it assuring every time he heard Arashi's soft spoken words? Maybe it's because when he's with Arashi he never have to hide himself. Arashi knows all his unspoken secrets and she understands. He smiled toward the girl, acknowledging her presence. The girl only shook her head and makes a move by crossing the room and sitting right besides him. 

"Don't think too much."

"What?"

"You heard me. I said don't think too much." Suddenly Arashi turns her face and smiles at him, "Sometimes you just have to let it flow Fuuma."

"Let… it flow?" He was puzzled by Arashi's words.

"Yes, my dear Fuuma. Feel the flow and you'll understand." She grins at him with a Cheshire cat like grin.

"I'm not Pocahontas and you're not Granny Willow so don't talk to me in puzzle because I don't understand what you're talking about." He lifted one of his eyebrows to emphasize the meanings of his words.

"Ne Fuuma, you're so thick sometimes." A pout is on Arashi's lips. "I can see that you're in love right now that's what I'm trying to say to you. You're just too blind to see it by yourself."

"Me? Arashi… I'm not in love. Confused? Yes. But in love? That's a little bit too much don't you think?"

"Say what you want. But I know what I see."

He sighed in defeat. Maybe Arashi is right. After all, these feelings he gets every time he saw Kamui must meant something, right? Sometimes he felt so happy just by seeing a smile creeping into Kamui's perfect feature, but there are also times when he felt so sad and alone every time he saw Kamui holding his sister's hands. And sometimes it even hurts deeper when he realized that Kamui would never see him, at least not in the way he wanted him to see. 

It pained him so much just to think about it. Maybe it is love. But love is not supposed to feel this way, right? It hurts because he knows that his love is unrequited. Kamui could never love him in return. The boy was already in love with his beautiful sister for so long. Didn't they say that it takes two to love, right? Maybe he was meant to love someone he could never have.

"What's wrong? You don't seem so happy with the fact." Arashi must have seen the sadness that glides inside his heart.

"Nothing's wrong." 

Of course nothing's wrong. Kamui loved Kotori and vice versa, they would be happy together. Everything is fine, really. Even if it means he could never have the one that he loved most for himself. But there's nothing wrong with that, right? He doesn't have the right to feel sad when the two persons he loved most are happy. That's what really happens, right?

He should be happy as well.

"How could you tell me that nothing's wrong, when all your eyes do is betraying all your feelings inside?" 

Arashi's soft fingers are tracing his cheekbones with gentle touches. He tried to avert his gaze from her eyes. He's afraid that he would spill everything inside his heart when he looked into her eyes.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Nothing's wrong." A smile always covers a perfect lie. "You don't have to worry about me. We'd better concentrate ourselves on the next month Kendo Competition."

He rose from the floor with a cold determination that he would never let such trivial matters like his feelings toward Kamui breaking his concentration from everything. What he feels toward Kamui is not important. The only matter is Kamui and Kotori's happiness. Nothing else matters to him.

"But Fuuma, denying it won't do any help. The feelings won't go away even if you ignored it." Arashi's hands are tugging at his sleeve. A frown marred her beautiful face, making it filled with worry and sadness.

He stopped and turned his head to see the girl's face. He only smiled slightly as he spoke, "You're reading too many shoujo manga Arashi."

"Fuuma," Arashi walks toward him and stares him right on the eye, "Don't think. Just let it flow."

And then the girl do something that is unexpected from her, she hugged him slightly before she whispered to him. "I will be here for you, when you need me to."

The taller boy only smiled and nodded. "I know."

***

"Ne… Kamui-kun, have you decided which club that you're going to join?" Segawa Keiichi is standing besides his best friend, Shirou Kamui, with a curious look on his face. The two boys are enjoying the lazy afternoon together simply by observing the school's club activity from the second floor balcony. 

"Ngh… I don't know. I don't find anything interesting here." Kamui didn't lie because he did feel quite bored only by watching the whole school club activity.

"What about joining the football club? All the boys in school want to enter the football club since Kotori-chan is the manager. They all hope to catch a glimpse of her or maybe if they're lucky enough they could date Kotori-chan one day. Blind hope, I'd say. Monou-sempai won't let that happen, not in a million years." Keiichi is pointing at the football field where a bunch of male students are trying to catch Kotori's attention. Kamui only shrugged, "I don't know. I don't really think that I need a reason only to be close with Kotori-chan."

"Sorry. Forgot that you're one of those special people who's allowed by Monou-sempai to be close with Kotori-chan." Keiichi only grins at him with a silly lopsided grin.

"Hn."

In the corner of his eyes, suddenly Kamui saw something interesting. A bunch of students with hakamas are laughing and walking together. It looks like they just finished their practice session.

"What about those students? Which club are they?"

"You mean the ones with hakamas? They're from the kendo club. Monou-sempai is the kaichou. Most girls join the kendo club for him while the boys join the club for Kishuu Arashi, the secretary. Speak of the devil, there they are."

Kamui saw a beautiful girl with a long pony tail is talking with a tall boy in a friendly manner. The boy shook his head few times before the girl catch the boy and… HUG him!!! 

Kamui's eyes widened in amazement. He just saw Kishuu Arashi HUGGED Fuuma, his best friends. He heard a whistle is coming out from Keiichi's lips. 

"So I guess it's official then."

"What is official?"

"Ne Kamui, can't you see what's just happened? They're quite a picture aren't they? Beautiful people, that's what they are. You know… the talk that saying that they're already an item. Not too impossible I supposed. I can see that the thick layer of ice is melting down every time she's around Monou-sempai. Man, he even let her hugged him.  Trust me, Segawa Keiichi, as your number one gossip teller."

"Keiichi, I think you're just making things up."

"What? You didn't believe me? But you just saw them HUGGING. Oooh I can't wait to tell the Monou Sempai's fans club about this." 

"Fuuma has a fans club? Weird." Kamui quickly shook his head to clear off his mind before adding his comments, "But it's just a friendly hug Keiichi, there's nothing wrong with that."

Kamui's protest was only answered with a snort.

***

"Oniichan."

In the middle of the school corridor, a girl is standing with a smile in her face. Her golden hair was overflowed with the golden lights emanating from the afternoon sky.

"Kotori, what are you doing here? I thought you're supposed to be with Kamui by now."

"Ne Oniichan, you're not forgetting that I'm the Football club manager aren't you?" Kotori answers him with a giggle. Her beautiful face looking slightly tired and there's sheen of sweat on her forehead. She was carrying a basket filled with wet towels and dirty football uniforms. Apparently she's just finished her core on picking up the dirty stuff from the Football club room.

"I thought I already tell Yuuto not to bear you with such physical activity like this." He was angry to see his sister in a condition like this. Secretly he swore that he would get some 'talk' with Yuuto right away. "Your heart cannot bear such burden like this Kotori. I think you'd better quit the club right now."

"Oniichan! The doctors already said that it's OK for me to do this!" A huff answered his angry statement, "Besides Oniichan, I'm the one who ask for the job my self from Yuuto-sempai."

"Kotori…"

"I thought we already agree with this." The girl is giving him a death glare right now. She was ready for a battle, judging from the way her hands stuck on her waist.

He sighed. "Okay… okay… I give up."

"That's more like it." Kotori smiled at him with a sweet smile. "Ne Oniichan, It will take quite a long time before I finish the laundry. If you want to, you and Kamui could go home first. I'll go home with Keiko-chan today."

"No. I'll wait for you. Besides I'm sure Kamui will wait for you too."

"Niichan…" Kotori sighed. She really doesn't want to bother her brother again. She's 16 this year and it's quite natural if she wanted a space of her own. It's not like she doesn't love her brother, but sometimes she felt as if she's already taking too many times and parts of her brother's life. A pang of guilt always coming over her every time she remembers on how Fuuma used to put everything aside only for her. She wanted a life, not only for her but also for her brother. 

Fuuma ruffled her hair affectionately, "Don't worry. I'll tell Kamui about this and we can go home together."

But Fuuma always smiled and told her that everything would be alright. And she hates to see that smile fade away every time Fuuma saw her with a sad look on her face. That's why she never stopped smiling.

"Oniichan…"

"Hn?"

"Thank you."

And she smiled. That's the least she can do for him.

***

After spending the whole afternoon watching the club activity, Kamui still doesn't have a clue on what club he's going to join. But he needs to join a club because the school counselor has already asked him to join a club in order to promote his social skill. A sigh is coming out of his lips. Right now he has a sudden urge to bang his head on his school desk in desperation. Maybe Keiichi could help him, since the boy knows so much about the school. 

"Keiichi, what club are you in?" 

"Me? Well I join the school newspaper club this semester. It's a pretty fun club, I think. We used to gather loads of gossips… er… I mean information from the students."

School newspaper eh? Sounds like fun. Well, Kamui always loves to write though he's not a very good writer. Besides he doesn't really go for sports and other outdoor activity. Maybe the school newspaper club would be a good choice for him.

"OK. I'll join the club."

Kamui was picking his things up when Keiichi suddenly grope him from behind. He yelped before finally fall to the floor along with the blond boy.

"I'm so happy Kamui-kun. You won't regret your choice." The blond boy was hovering over him and hugged him so tight, he can barely breathe.

"Keiichi, I can't breathe."

"Sorry." Keiichi grins sheepishly before letting go his arms. "I just got over excited."

"Keiichi… you're so heavy, you could move now." A blush is slowly covering his cheeks when he realized the situation he's in with the blond boy. With Keiichi laid atop him, anyone will obviously thinking that he's in that state for a purpose.

"Oh okay, it's too bad since the view was great actually." 

Keiichi was about to move when the classroom door was suddenly opened by a very shocked Fuuma. 

***

He can't believe his eyes.

Did he just see Kamui in a very compromising position with another boy? He saw a blond boy hovered over Kamui's slender frame and Kamui's state doesn't do any help to his imagination. A blush is creeping in the boy's face, added with his slightly messy hair they are making him look more and more… sexy. Thus they're leaving his imagination everywhere.

He blinked twice before finding his voice,

"Kamui…?" 

A sudden wave of anger is flowing inside his vein. Fuuma was angry. So angry because it wasn't his hands that's touching Kamui's body. He turns his face to hide his anger from Kamui.

"Sorry to disturb you but Kotori said that she'd be late. You… you could go home first if you want to. I…"

Kamui saw the changes in his best friend's expression. Fuuma always turns his face when something bothered him. He gently pushed Keiichi aside and tried to catch Fuuma's hands.

"I guess I'll leave the two of you alone."

Just before Kamui manage to hold his hands, Fuuma turns his back and start to walk away. Seeing his best friends back speeding away, an aching feeling filled Kamui's heart. Fuuma's steps are forceful and fast. Kamui nearly run and jump the stairs in order to catch him.

"Fuuma, wait!!"

Fuuma stopped in his track. His fists were balled and they're shaking with anger. He counted to ten to hold his fury.

"Fuuma…You've misunderstood. There's nothing between me and Keiichi." 

"Fuuma…" a hand is touching his hand gently making the fist yield and open itself, "Please don't be angry." He felt that Kamui's fingers are snaking between his own fingers. A bowed head is leaning on his shoulder, spreading a warm feeling inside his heart. The scent of apple and mint was coming from Kamui's silky head. He had fall in love with the scent since his childhood days.

He sighed.

Kamui is right. What right does he have to be angry with Kamui? Kamui's love life doesn't concern him. He was, after all, only a childhood friend of Kamui.

"I'm not. I'm just tired."

Kamui loved the feeling he gets when he feels the way Fuuma's fingers intertwined with his. He sighs as he puts his head in Fuuma's broad shoulder. He felt secure and protected. It assures him that Fuuma really cares about him just like the way he used to be in their childhood days and the realization makes him happy, more than anything in the world. 

"Really?" He tries to look into Fuuma's golden eyes but his best friends only averted his gaze. He felt hurt.

"Fuuma?"

Fuuma turns his eyes to see Kamui's violet eyes upon hearing Kamui's hurted voice. Did he just hurt him?

"I'm sorry." Fuuma's voice sounds so gentle and caring. Kamui closed his eyes and leaned closer to him. He loved the scent of Fuuma's body. He smelled like rain and musk. 

"It's okay." Kamui smiled because he just saw himself reflected in Fuuma's golden eyes. Fuuma cares. He knows it the moment he looked into his eyes.

Deep inside his heart, a question was nagging Kamui's mind. Why did he bother himself to catch Fuuma just because he doesn't want Fuuma misunderstood his situation with Keiichi?

Why?

***

Please tell me why can't I breathe when you're near me? 

Breathe when you're close to me…

_Kamui's body is warm and pliant under his. He can feel the pulse that was running under his alabaster neck. Fuuma's lips start to search and explore the skin making the body under him writhing helplessly. He had always adored Kamui's ivory skin. He amazed to the softness he felt under his lips._

I know you know

I lost in loving you deeply

Loving you secretly…

_He traced his fingers on to Kamui's jaw line lovingly, as if he wanted to savour the feelings he get every time he touched the skin. He'd been holding the feelings for too long. Keeping as a secret in his life. _

_Before he fell in love with Kamui, he never knew that loving someone secretly could bring so much sorrow to a soul. It hurts so bad when you're unable to tell the one you love how you feel about them._

"Kamui… I…"

And I crashed in my mind whenever you are near

Getting deaf, dumb, and blind

Just drowning in despair

"Kamui, I love…"

_His lips start to move, feel, and touch the skin under him. He kissed the lips desperately. Their tongues start to dance in a rhythm. Kamui's lips are soft and yielding under his. But his eyes are closed._

I am lost to your flame, it's burning like the sun

_He needs to see those eyes as he spokes the words. He whispers hoarsely, demandingly, "Open your eyes for me Kamui."_

And I call out your name the moment you are gone

"Kamui…"

"Kamui… I love you."

_The boy opens his eyes. But Fuuma finds them empty and blank. There's no reflection of him in those violet orbs. In the end he can only whispers sadly,_

"I will never have your love, will I … Kamui?"

The moment you are gone…

***

That night, Monou Fuuma wakes up to find the tears flowing over his cheek bones and disappeared somewhere around his neck.

TBC

A/N: Finally I can update this chapter! Sorry for the delay I was bedridden for about two weeks due to my mysterious illness T_T. I was so weak I cannot touch my PC . 

So what do you think about the chapter? I try to put some lime part on this chapter. I tried… but apparently it doesn't work ~_~ I was too busy in hiding my blush when I type the part. For you Sei-chan shipper, Sei-chan is coming in the next chapter. And oh yeah I put a quotation of a song in the fic, does anyone knows what song it is? It's Saybia's The Day After Tomorrow. ^o^ I love the song and I think the song really describe Fuuma's feelings on this chapter.

**WiredGIRL-san**: Oh you would? I'd love to see it. By the way, I don't know why but apparently the email was having a trouble so I changed my email to white_mint_ice@yahoo.com  ^_^ I'm really looking forward to see your picture.

**Yanagi-san**: Your Fuuma on Millions of Dreams really reminds me of Gackt. Thank you for the compliment!

**Lady Zephyros-san**: Thank you for the correction! You're right. And I'm sorry for the long update.

**Saria-san**: Ryuichi Sakuma ne? 

"Yuuki is mine!!!"

"Yours am I?"

This is one of my favourite dialogue in Gravitation. About Kotori, I guess you just have to wait and see. Sei-chan is coming on the next chapter. ^-^

**Yamato-san**: **grins **I'm sorry for the long update. About Kotori? Oh you nearly spoiled the surprise. ^__^

And the last but not least Athrun forever! I'm still crazy about the boy! ^o^ Now that he and Kira are no longer enemies, I am longing to read a yaoi fanfic about them. 


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**: X and related characters belong to CLAMP, not me. Though I really want to have Fuuma as my plushie…

Blinded 

An X/1999 Fanfiction by pluto-mint.

Rating: PG-13 

Pairings: F/K, S/S, Fuu/Su, K/K, etc.

Summary: AU. They're sixteen and they're in love.

Minna-san…. I'm sorry for the long update. Been quite busy lately… Gomennasai! ^_^ Blinded Chapter 4 

Kamui was enjoying the beautiful Sunday morning together with Kotori, they're talking and laughing about nothing at all. Both of them sat on the terrace floor with their legs folded while occasionally watching the white clouds floating over the blue sky. Sometimes they tried to figure out the shape of the cloud. Kamui kept saying that all the clouds have the shape of a sheep. Kotori just giggle at the comment, sometimes she tried to make a correction but in the end it's useless because Kamui was too stubborn to admit it.

Kamui was always like that. He could be very persistent sometimes. 

Kotori smiled and the smile made Kamui happy. He sipped his jasmine tea and enjoying the warmth of Kotori's smile. His heart beat a little too fast every time he saw the smile.

_It's perfect._

The green grass seemed to glow under the ray of early summer sun. Though spring was almost over but the coolness within was still linger in the morning air. The shrine looked so fresh and clean and its presence made the morning felt more peaceful. Through the thick branches of the tree, few streaking line of the summer sun were coming through, making Kotori's golden hair glow even more.

_Kotori looked so beautiful._

Kamui blushed at the thought. He's always been attracted to Kotori since they're little. But just being together like this, was a complete bliss for Kamui. He had always liked Kotori but now he feels something deeper than that. He wondered if this is the same feeling that could make someone giving away all of his possession for a moment like this? Maybe he's not just being attracted to Kotori, maybe he's-

"Kamui-chan, you're spacing out again. Are you alright?" 

Kotori's soft and concern words snap him back to reality. He smiled warmly to her. "I'm alright. I was just thinking."

"What were you thinking?"

"Oh. Nothing."

"I don't believe you," there's still a smile on her face but that didn't conceal the sadness in her eyes, "Usually when Oniichan said 'nothing', it means that something really troubled his mind."

"Kotori…" The girl bowed her head slightly. The strands of her golden hair covered her eyes. But they didn't manage to conceal her sadness. Kamui felt a tight knot in his chest. To see her in such a state was just too much for him. Gently he took her hands and gave it a light squeeze.

Their fingers intertwined with each other, as if they're trying to be each other strength. Kotori turned her face and smiled to him. "I'm fine. Don't worry about me. I'm just worried about Oniichan, lately he looked so broken and empty. But every time I asked him what's wrong he only smiled and said nothing. I hate to see him like that." 

Kotori's words hit him hard like a slap on his face. Something's wrong with Fuuma and Kotori noticed this. But he didn't.

He should have noticed this.

What kind of friend is he? Guilty feeling filled his heart. How could he never notice it? He's too preoccupied with his life. Fuuma was still his best friend or maybe more because he could never imagine what his life would be without Fuuma by his side. 

"But you're not the only Kotori, it also makes me sad.  I'll talk to him today. Maybe he would tell me something about it."  

"Kamui-chan," Kotori's eyes were filled with gratitude, "Thank you."

***

He ran his hand through his dampened hair. His skin was glistened with a sheer layer of water due to the shower he just took. He used to think that a cold shower could soothe his anger, and maybe the burning feeling inside his heart right now. But he was wrong. Not even a cold shower could cool down his temper right now. 

Through his slightly opened window, he could see the couple laughing and talking about nothing at all. 

His heart burned with jealousy, he should be the one and the only one who could make _his_ Kamui laughed like that. 

He sighed in frustration.

Damn!!! But it's wrong… so wrong… 

He should be happy for them… but… he couldn't bring himself to do it. 

Get over it Monou! 

He told himself over and over again but that didn't wipe the anger away from his heart. He's so angry, he fumbled slightly to find his loose pants and somehow managed to wear it without tearing the fabric apart. Deliberately he took a black short sleeve shirt from the drawers and put it on without even bother to button the shirt. 

A hand reached to the nightstand where his eye glasses lay. He pushed his glasses gently to the bridge of his nose with his index finger, not many people knew that he wore eye glasses occasionally. Subaru was the one who picked the eye glasses for him. It was modeled like John Lennon's eye glasses. The emerald eyed boy said that the eye glasses made him look more 'friendly'. He didn't take Subaru's comment seriously but he still bought it. He needed the glasses anyway.

Glancing to the couple once again, he felt another emotion flooded his heart. Despair. He let his head fall and touched the window glass. Another sigh was coming out of his lips. He closed his eyes but all he could see was Kamui, Kamui's smile… Kamui's eyes… the violet shade of his eyes… everything that is Kamui. He couldn't think anything else besides Kamui. 

Don't think, don't feel… 

He groaned slightly. He hasn't got his usual morning coffee, maybe that's why he felt so emotional this morning. Or maybe he just loved Kamui a little bit too much.

Smiling bitterly, he rubbed his temple to soothe his headache. 

I need my black coffee right now! 

At least in the kitchen he could enjoy his morning coffee peacefully.

***

"Kamui?"

They met halfway on the stairs. Kamui was headed to Fuuma's room before he saw the older boy walking down the stairs. Kamui smiled to him with his shy smile. A faint shade of pink tinted his pale cheeks. They only made him look more cute and adorable.

"Ohayou Fuuma, where were you all this morning?"

_Ah… so he noticed._

_But that doesn't mean a thing._

Fuuma just smiled and passed him by, trying to ignore his anger toward Kamui. Kamui had let himself touched by Kotori. _You belong to me Kamui…_ Fuuma thought helplessly.  

***

"Fuuma..?"

"Fuuma… I need to talk with you."

Kamui's heart started to beat in a frantic pace because Fuuma didn't response to everything he said. _No… please don't ignore me again just like what you did that afternoon. Am I related to your trouble Fuuma?_

"Well? Why are you still standing there? Didn't you just say that you need to talk with me?"

The taller boy arched his eyebrow and bore his gaze to Kamui. "Kamui?"

"Aa." Kamui rushed himself to the kitchen.

Fuuma started to brew the coffee. Kamui noticed that Fuuma's wearing an eye glasses right now but instead making him looked clumsy, the eye glasses only made him looked smarter, more friendly, and of course more attractive. And when the boy turned around to find the mug, he could see the board chest that was covered with slightly tanned skin. The black shirt was unbuttoned, it exposed the smooth skin and the athletic torso freely for Kamui. Kamui blushed slightly when he found himself staring at Fuuma's body.

Maybe Fuuma had caught him staring, that's why the older boy grinned at him and said, "Why don't you come in? Or are you prefer enjoying the view from there?"

Kamui swore that his face could beat a tomato that moment.

Fuuma pulled the chair for Kamui and smiled to him, "I'm making some coffee, do you want some?"

The question brought confusion to Kamui. "Am I allowed to?"

Fuuma laughed softly, not in an insulting tone but plainly just because he's amused to Kamui's response. "What makes you think that you're not allowed?"

Kamui scratched his head, hoping to find the right answer. "Er… well coffee is only for adults. Though I'm barely sixteen this year, Tokiko-san doesn't find me as an adult."

"Oh… I understand what she thinks about you, you're just too cute sometimes. I couldn't even picture you drinking something like black coffee or alcohol. You are meant to be with milk, tea, and honey I guess." The soft laughter went along with Fuuma's words.

Kamui's face started to flush slightly. He disliked to be considered only as a 'kid'. And the word 'cute' was almost implying that he's weak, sometimes. It's true that he's still 16 but that didn't mean that he's not going to grow. But Fuuma had already grow so much, he could never catch up with him. He would be left behind once again.

Fuuma noticed the changes in Kamui's expression. Seeing his best friends bowed like a defeated soldier was too much for him. Slowly he crouched in front of Kamui, trying to make their eyes on the same level. Fingers started to wipe the bangs that covering Kamui's eyes. His voice was gentle and caring. 

"I'm not saying that you'll never grow up. The 'you' that is here right now in front of me would surely be different with the 'you' that I'm going to see in next five year. You will grow, and so am I. People will change and so are we. But something deep inside won't change, the one thing that is purely you Kamui. The same goes to me and Kotori and everyone else."

Kamui's eyes snap open and he stared deeply to Fuuma's eyes. Though they are covered with the eye glasses that he wore, Kamui could see the iris clearly. For once he noticed that Fuuma's eyes were a beautiful shade of gold. Not light brown as he used to think they were. But that didn't imply that Fuuma had changed. He was still and will always be the same boy in that golden afternoon.

Somehow Fuuma's words had answered all the worry that dwelled inside his heart lately. He gave his best smile to Fuuma, hands resting on his broad shoulder. This is another moment that he would treasure all his life. This serene moment was so special.

"I know Fuuma… I know."

His voice was barely a whisper. Fuuma's fingers ghosted around his face. Lips lookin so moist and warm. Enchanting, enticing. Their face was so close to each other, they could almost feel their breath mingled between their lips. Unconsciously Kamui made a weak throaty moan. Abruptly Fuuma took his fingers away. There's a glimpse of something in his eyes that Kamui could not quite fathom.

Fuuma smiled at him before turning his attention to the coffee machine. Kamui watched his every move intently.

And right now, Kamui felt very happy. Fuuma will never change. He knew that for sure.

But still he was slightly embarrassed when he thought about himself. Fuuma was so mature, he could never be someone like that. Well not in a near future anyway. What if he got left behind? What if he could never catch up with Fuuma?

The smell of freshly brewed coffee brought him back to reality. 

Fuuma's standing there in front of him, cradling his coffee lovingly.

"So… I guess you turned down coffee offer right?"

Kamui smiled.

"For now."

"Yes Kamui, for now."

"One day we'll have coffee together Fuuma."

"I'll be waiting." 

It's a promise. Not only a promise that ensured them to have coffee together in the future but it also implied that Fuuma would be there waiting for him. He was grateful to have Fuuma by his side.

***

He was glad that Kamui's alright now. The boy sat on the chair and smiled to him with gratitude. Looking so sweet and fragile and yet so enchanting. Seeing him like that is almost enough to make him lose control. And he almost is.

When his fingers ghosted around Kamui's face he couldn't help but to wonder how it felt to have those skins slide against his. When he saw Kamui's soft pink lips he can't help but to wonder if they are as sweet as they look like. And when he felt their breath mingled between their lips he can't help but to wonder how it felt to have their body mingled in unison. 

He almost kissed Kamui there.

What woke him up to reality was his illusion of Kamui's throaty moan. It could never happen.

Kamui rose from his seat. The sudden movement had made him a little nervous. His fingers trembled slightly. Kamui is only few inches away, he could kissed him right now.

"Fuuma… I …"

Kamui lowered his gaze. His long lashes fluttered and covered his eyes in a half lidded gaze, making him look almost shy.

Control yourself… 

But having Kamui so closed to him and looked almost willing to be kissed was too much.

So Fuuma unconsciously leaned closer to the smaller boy and started to close the gap between their lips. 

*Ring* *Ring*

_Damnit!!_ Just when he got the chance to kiss Kamui, his cell phones started to rang. 

"Fuuma… your cell phone…" Kamui smiled lightly to him. Doesn't the boy realized how beautiful he is?

"I know… I know…" He searched and his pocket and found what he's been looking for.

"Moshi-moshi, … Yuuto?... No, I'm not busy…Aa… Okay. I'll be there in 15 minutes, ja!"

Fuuma shut his cell phones and put his coffee on the table. A part of him felt grateful that Yuuto had called him right before he brushed his lips against Kamui's. But he couldn't deny the other part of him that regret it. _It's safer if I don't kiss him, he could broke our friendship if I do that._

"Where are you going?"

"To meet someone. We've promised to watch the soccer match together. Sorry for the interruption Kamui. We haven't talked yet so I guess we'll talk later okay?"

Kamui somehow look disappointed but then again maybe he just making things up.

"I'd better be going, I'll find Kotori first."

"Fuuma…"

"Hmm?"

The smaller boy unexpectedly was walking toward him before tugging his shirt lightly.

"Your shirt… it's unbuttoned. Let me fix that for you…"

He was startled. He never thought that he would get so much attention from Kamui. He caught his breath when he felt the soft thread of Kamui's silky hair tickled his jaw. And that apple and mint scent that was so Kamui were flowing inside his vein again. He could lose his control easily and he would regret it…. Well not really...

Slowly Kamui started to do the button near his collar bone, the tip of fingers grazed the skin of Fuuma's jaw in order to do that. Fuuma had to hold back the moan that was threatening to be sound. He felt so special and so honoured to have such a lavish attention from Kamui.

Kamui's fingers worked the other button, this time it was the skin on Fuuma's chest that was touched by Kamui soft and delicate fingers. The touch felt so intimate. It's like Kamui's trying to search for something that was hidden inside him. 

Soon the other buttons followed. Fingers touching his skin. The skin on  the upper part of his abdomen… the skin just a little over his navel… He made a choking sound everytime Kamui touched him. A vain attempt to cover his moan. But Kamui was so serious in doing his task, he made no sign that he was hearing the sound the other boy made. 

Kamui's fingers making their path steadily. Going under. The anticipation of the touch almost made Fuuma want to scream. If he hadn't knew Kamui he might think that Kamui was seducing him, but the fact is he's not. The boy was too clueless and naïve for his own good. Everytime their skin met Fuuma tried hard to control himself from ravishing Kamui here and now. 

Finally it's the last button. 

"Fuuma… your skin is so soft."

Kamui's fingers marvel along the skin of his arm. The gesture was intimate in so many ways.

"I guess we can do this again another time." Kamui sighed softly.

Fuuma's mind was in a daze, he dimly wondered if Kamui had meant to touch him again. But as soon his consciousness come into his mind he realized that Kamui was implying to the talk.

"Of course we can Kamui." Fuuma said with a smile, "Anytime."

TBC

A/N: I know… I know… I've promised to put Sei-chan this chapter, but I got too carried away with Fuuma-Kamui fluffy moments. For you Sei-chan shipper I will put him on the next chapter. There will be Subaru too as well. So look up for next chapter again Ok?

I'm working this chapter in a gloomy mood, I thought I was going to make another angsty chapter. But I'm glad it didn't turn out that way… wouldn't want to spoil the fluffy moment for the sake of our dear Fuuma ^_^.  And for you Sei/Su shipper, I have planned to make a special chapter for them. Just wait and see…

By the way, I always think that Fuuma looked so sexy with his glasses * flipping the page of X vol.14 * . Don't you all agree with me?

Please review this chapter. I need to wipe away this gloomy mood of mine… I need my Athrun too **sigh**. Athrun forever! Yay!

**Yanagi-san**: **smile** You always be the first one to review my fic, thank you. Though Sei-chan isn't here yet but I hope the F/K fluffy moment would light this chapter. ^_^

**Whales-san**: Thank you! ^_^  though I'm not sure if Fuuma's IC in this chapter. Seishirou? He will be there on the next chapter.

**Gisela-san**: No, I'm not going to make our dear Fuuma having a split personality but there will be times when he will show his Dark Kamui personality. You find my idea original? Thank you. ^o^ And every body is wondering about Kotori, read the fic and I'll tell you. ^_^

**Bella15-san**: I will. Don't worry ^_^

**Lady Zephyros-san**: Why, thank you! I hope you like this chapter.


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer**: X and related characters belong to the one and only CLAMP. Not mine.

Blinded

An X fan fiction by Pluto-mint

Summary: X AU with no end of the world issue, just boy fall in love with another boy.

Warning: Shounen ai and a bit lime in other chapters.

Rating: PG-13

Pairings: F/K/K, Seishirou/Subaru, Fuuma/Subaru, etc.

Minna-san… sorry for the long update! Enjoy this chapter for Sei-chan is here!

__

_Blinded_

__

Chapter 5

It was a quiet afternoon. Only a faint rustle of the window curtain, billowed by the evening breeze, could be heard. Beside the windowsill, a vase filled with roses was resting over the nightstand. The dim light of the sunset flowed through the window glass, creating a river of gold along the figure lied in the middle of the bed.

It was a boy, no, maybe a man on his youth. No more than twenty two, with soft and wispy hair, looking so beautiful and fragile in the midst of the white sheet tangled around his body. His closed eyelids covered the golden irises below. His hair, thrown carelessly around his effeminate face and fallen over the white pillow, created an illusion of halo for him. Drowned in his sleep, the youth looked almost like a sleeping beauty.

Almost. 

Because, as beautiful as he was, the image was broken with the sounds of his shallow breathings, the weak beeping sounds from the life supporting machine, the perfect stillness of the body, and the IV tube tangled around his arms.

The youth was not asleep, never was asleep. He was lost in his unconsciousness, drowned in the state of a coma and looked so fragile in his sleep. Alone that he was, wandering on his dreams. Sometimes some people visited him, they talked to him. Sometimes they wondered if he was able to hear them in his sleep. But that didn't stop them from talking. And right now the room was empty, thus it became so silent.

But the silence was lost when a soft knock was heard and soon it followed by the creaking sound of an opened door. Someone was there to visit the youth and maybe he would stay for a while to read him something from his favorite poetry book. 

The visitor's face was welcomed by the soft gust of the wind came through the opened window. He was a man with a handsome face, beautiful in some intriguing way. His expression was soft and yet unreadable with his glassy brown eyes covered by a silver frame spectacle. His tall frame was clad with a black suit and a neat black tie. With an armful of flowers, sunflowers to be exact, the black coat rested gently in his other arm. He smiled slightly as he saw the figure sleeping on the bed. 

Slowly, he walked to the windowsill, emptied the vase from the roses and filled it with all the sunflowers in his arm before sitting gently in the edge of the bed. The coat was rested somewhere on the nightstand. Bending his back to lean closer to the youth, he gave the youth a gentle kiss in his forehead.

"I'm sorry I haven't visited you for a while. There are a lot of things to handle." His hands were holding the youth's hand, interlacing their finger with his and brushing his hand to his cheek. "Oh, I hope you don't mind I changed the roses she gave you with these sunflowers." His eyes softened as he gently wipe the bangs from the youth's face. "But I guess you wouldn't be mind, would you? After all, in the language of flower, the sunflowers mean that 'I'm always watching you'. They would be a good company in your solitude. It must be so lonely to be stranded here all alone."

Loneliness caught in his eyes. The man, just like the youth, was alone all the time, lonely and lost with no one to hold. For a while the eyes looked so distance, as if they were trying to pull something from the past. There were times when things weren't this complicated, there were times when he could laugh without lying to himself. That he was laughing for the happiness that he truly had. 

But he didn't live in the past. He shook his head to clear off his mind.

"Believe me, I know the feeling too well… Kakyou."

Sakurazuka Seishirou smiled gently as he kissed the other's hand softly.

***

Subaru stood in the middle of the park, under the midst of the falling leaves, with his head tilted up to see the early night sky and the newly awaken moon. Its silvery glow started to light up the night. He had always fascinated by the moon. Fascinated of how its pearly white surface always reminded him to a certain someone. So far away and always out of reach.

And yet it looked so beautiful, he couldn't help himself not to fall into the mystery.

He shivered from the cold gust of the winds, hands on his pocket sought for warmth. In times like these his sister used to make him a hot chocolate to give him some warmth. He felt so cold and lonely by standing there, reminiscing to the past that always haunt him.

If only… if only he could forgot the past and moved on. But he couldn't. That's why he felt so cold and distant.

Something pulled him out of his reverie as warm breaths ghosted around his cheek bones. "Subaru, why did you always daydreaming every time I see you?" Fuuma breathed slowly as he wrapped his arms around Subaru's smaller frame. "You're cold. I'm sorry for making you waiting. Kotori just finished her weekly meeting with the doctor a few minutes ago."

He smiled slightly at the sudden warmth that was covering him. "Ne Fuuma, it's okay."

Fuuma lose his arms around Subaru and smiled. "Baka. You could've waited for me some place warmer than standing here."

"Don't call me baka." Subaru crossed his arms and huffed.

"You're right. Baka doesn't suit you. Baka-chan would suit you perfectly." Fuuma grinned and ruffled his hair. "Hey, you better watch your manner. I'm older than you remember?" Subaru frowned at him.

"Oh yeah?" Fuuma bent his back and whispered lowly in Subaru's ear, trying to be seductive, "Well, I'm taller than you Subaru-chan."

Subaru blushed furiously and Fuuma burst out laughing.

"You really are cute."

Subaru secretly smiled, he'd gotten used with his best friend's teasing. It's sort of reminded him of the past actually. It's comforting in a strange way. Fuuma's teasing always gave him that warm feeling inside his heart.

The slight tugging on his shirt snapped Subaru out of his little trance. "Come on, we'd better get you something to make you warm or else your grand mother will kill me for making you sick."

"A cup of coffee sounds like a good idea."

"Coffee?" Fuuma's brow started to knit together, "I think there's a coffee shop nearby the hospital maybe we could try some. Okay. Let's go." Fuuma pulled Subaru's hand and lead their way to the coffee shop.

After 10 minutes of walking, and some childish teasing from Fuuma, they finally found themselves sitting in a cozy corner inside the coffee shop just beside the glassy window. "This is a nice place." Subaru smiled and started to check the menu. "Well, I hope the coffee's great." Fuuma had already decided that he wanted to try the mocha latte. "What are you going to order, Subaru?"

"I think I'll try the cappuccino."

"Your wish is my command, my dear Sumeragi-sama." The younger boy grinned at him and waved his hand to call the waitress. A woman, in her late twenties, was approaching their table. She was a beautiful woman with gorgeous wavy red hairs and a body that could made every men turned their eyes on her. From the way she dressed, it appeared that she was not a waitress maybe she's the owner of the café.

"I'm sorry for the inconvenience. Our employee is taking a day off due to her sickness. I am Kasumi Karen at your service." The woman winked at them, making Subaru's face tainted with a faint shade of red. "Such a sweet couple you are."

Fuuma almost choked when he saw Subaru's expression. The older boy's face had turned so red he could matched a tomato. 

"Why, thank you Kasumi-san," Fuuma grinned and decided to test if Subaru's face could turn any redder than a tomato, "I think my dear Subaru-kun wanted to try the cappuccino, as for me, I'd like to try the mocha latte please." 

Karen giggled softly and Subaru's face was beating a tomato.

"Your orders will be served in 5 minutes, I hope you enjoy our specially blended coffee." Karen smiled seductively, winked at Subaru before she left the table and spoke, "You got a charming boyfriend Subaru-san."

Fuuma nearly burst out laughing when he saw all the colors faded away from Subaru's face. The boy had turned so pale when he heard Karen's statement.

"Fuuuuumaaaa….." Subaru hissed under his breath. "Why, I'm hurt Subaru. Don't you want to be my boyfriend?" Dramatically Fuuma wiped his tears -from laughing too hard- and clutched his heart in a pained expression.

Subaru sighed in defeat and muttered, "Baka."

Fuuma just grinned and said, "You just can't resist my charm."

When their coffee served, Subaru was lucky enough to survive all the teasing without having his head blasted due to all the blood rushes to his head. 

The smell of freshly brewed coffee invaded all his senses. They gave him a pleasant feeling inside his heart. He shook his head and started to stir the cappuccino calmly.

"My grand mother is pleased with your academic achievement. She wanted to prolong the scholarship until you finished your degree in the university."

"She did?" Fuuma asked incredulously while sipping his coffee, "Why?"

The Monou's was not a poor family but after his father's death Fuuma had to deal with some financial difficulty. Mainly it's because of Kotori's treatment due to her health problems. Fuuma wasn't even sure that he could continue his education to the university degree. Fortunately, Lady Sumeragi had known their father for a long time and soon all of their 'little financial problems' was taken care by the infamous Sumeragi corp. Lady Sumeragi also seemed to be quite fond to him. Maybe it's because he was Subaru's best friend.

"I don't know." Subaru shrugged and sipped the coffee silently, "The coffee is nice. My grand mother also wanted to see you as soon as possible."

"I can't leave Kotori all alone." Fuuma frowned. "Do I really have to go Subaru?"

"Apparently my grand mother wanted you to go to Kyoto University. Maybe she wanted to convince you. I think she wanted you to stay in Kyoto so that I would never go to Tokyo again just to see you." There's a serious look on Subaru's face. "She always wanted to control my life."

"She wanted what is best for you." Fuuma replied calmly. "She thinks that it would be best for you to stay in Kyoto. But I guess the reason you went to Tokyo all the time is not only to see me."

For a while there's a glint of something in those deep emerald eyes. "I hate your mind reading capability."

"That's a part of my charm." That seductive smile was there again. "Your grand mother wanted you to have the best. But the only person who knows what is best for you is yourself. Don't push yourself Subaru."

"What I want is something that I will never have. What I want maybe is not what is best for me." Subaru sighed. "I just wanted to be happy."

_You feel lonely_, the little voice inside his heart chimed, _you wanted to be with him_. Subaru felt a little embarrassed for saying things like that in front of Fuuma. He lifted his head to see the teasing look on his best friend's eyes but instead he found them blank and empty.

"Happy…" Fuuma's eyes seemed so lost in his own thought, lost in an illusion of a certain pair of violet eyes._ Kamui. _

"Everyone is looking for their happiness." Fuuma's smile couldn't conceal the sadness in his eyes. "I wanted to be happy too…"_ but I can't be happy if I ever hurt someone that I love. He didn't love me though. His voice was barely a whisper._

"Fuuma…" Subaru's hand reached his best friend's hand, squeezing it gently. "Fuuma… are you okay?"

A faint shade of pink tinted the younger boy's cheek. "Aa…" A sheepish smile was there to cover his embarrassment. "We all wanted to be happy, don't we Subaru?"

"My sister used to tell me to strive for my own happiness. To make my wishes come true, to reach for my dreams." Subaru smiled slightly. The mention of Subaru's sister caught Fuuma's attention. Subaru rarely talked about his past, let alone his sister. "My being in Tokyo is related to her advice. I am here to make my wishes come true." 

"Whatever it takes?"

"I guess so. We have the right to be happy Fuuma."

Fuuma smiled upon hearing Subaru's answer and brushed his hands along Subaru's cheekbones, "You surely are a persistent one Subaru."

"Not really." Subaru blushed at the sudden touch, looking really cute when he's shy.

Fuuma's mouth twitched into a grin. "Then I'll just have to take my words back because I think that you're really cute right now." His words were answered by another shade of pink in Subaru's face.

He laughed and it felt really good to laugh. Subaru knew him too well. Somehow the older boy had comforted him, telling him in a strange way that it's not wrong to love Kamui.

_We have the right to be happy._

***

The rain drops fell softly to the ground. He stood in the middle of the crowd. He was alone and yet not alone at the same time. Shielded by the midst of panicking people due to the rain's sudden fall, he watched all his surroundings. His eye glasses were wet with all the droplets of water flowing on its glassy surface. A few meters away from his spot stood a coffee shop. He could easily avoid the trickled rain by entering it. But he didn't. He didn't want to be seen, beside he loved the feeling of how the soft rivulet of water soaking through the fabric of his shirt, washing away whatever feeling he had inside his heart. His black coat hung loosely in his hand. A breath he didn't know he was holding escaping through his lips. 

The rain started to fall more heavily. He was sure that he would get himself soaking wet if he didn't put his coat on. But he couldn't move, couldn't tear his eyes off the couple sitting nearby the café's window glasses. Two boys, in their late teen, laughed and smiled to each other. They looked so happy.

The taller boy brushed his hands along the smaller boy cheek bones, rewarded by a beautiful blush. The golden eyed boy laughed and the emerald eyed one smiled shyly. He gritted his teeth so hard, his jaw hurt. A whimper escaping his lips, "Subaru…"

Was it fate that he'd seen the boy he'd been avoided to see for these past five year? The boy had grown into a beautiful man, more beautiful than his dreams. He used to hold the boy in his arms, soothing him with soft whispers, touching him with his fingers. And now the boy was touched by someone else's fingers, smiled to another one's compliments. Subaru was his in the past. He never claimed to love the boy but Subaru was his nevertheless. And he would claim what was his back.

He stared at the couple for a quite some time before Subaru caught his eyes. Those deep emerald eyes had changed, they used to be so bright but now they were tainted with an empty hole. _Subaru thinks about me_. He smiled as hew took off his eye glasses, _you're still mine Subaru-kun. _

He smirked at the thought. He could easily snatch Subaru out of the golden eyed boy hands right now, Subaru was way too attached with his past. But he won't. His emotion had over powered him. He couldn't think clearly, all of his action could turn into a reckless move. Besides, he smirk, he didn't want to scare Subaru away.

The boy inside the café abruptly stood from his seat and rushed to the door. Turning his back, slowly, he walked away from the café. He didn't want to see Subaru right now, not when the golden eyed boy was with him. There would be times –_oh yes, there will_- when he could get Subaru all alone, he smirked once again, and he didn't have a plan to let the boy slipped away from his hands. 

_You are mine Subaru_, Seishirou thought with an enigmatic smile in his handsome face.

***

"It's raining." Fuuma spoke in a gentle tone. 

"I like the rain." Subaru stated in a low voice. Smiling at the memory of playing in the rain with his sister, Subaru sipped his cappuccino once again.

"I'm glad that Kotori had forced me to bring an umbrella. She said that summer rain is bad for your health." Fuuma laughed softly and patted his back pack, "I take it that you didn't bring any umbrella with you."

Nodding his head, Subaru smiled and answered, "I'd rather play in the rain than wearing an umbrella."

"You could be so childish some time." The golden eyed boy just smiled and turned his face to see the street. It was almost dinner time, the moon hung over the night sky with a few stars on its side. Making the night sky looked so beautiful despite the rain.

Subaru just smiled and sipped his coffee for the last time. He looked to the outside and saw people panicking and scattered due to the rain that fell heavily. Some people didn't understand the simple joy of standing in the middle of the rain. In the corner of his eye he caught a figure standing in the midst of the rain. A man stood in the middle of the rain his coat off, hair dampened by the rain, and smiling at him. He took off his eye glasses, revealing his deep brown eyes.

_Seishirou__! _

Subaru abruptly rose from his seat, earning a look from his best friend.

"Subaru?" A tone of worry colored the Fuuma's voice. "Fuuma… I'll wait for you on the outside." Subaru answered with a shaky voice before running to the door.

_He's here. He's watching me._

_Seishirou__…_

Once he's on the outside, his eyes started to sweep all his surroundings.

The man was no where to be seen. Was it only an illusion? 

"Seishirou…" a shaky breath escaped from his lips. 

The rain splattered around his face, he felt so cold and empty. He wrapped his arms around his body, trying to warm himself. Did he miss Seishirou that much? Making an illusion of him in his mind? He wanted to cry.

"Subaru…"

An arm draped around his torso. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He lied to Fuuma. He could hear the other boy sighed, warm breath caressing his skin, making them warm. "It's okay. Everything is going to be alright."

Fuuma hold him a little tighter. Subaru turned his head and whispered with a shaky breath, "Can I stay with you for the night?"

The taller boy smiled. "You didn't have to ask." Fuuma knew that right now Subaru needed a comfort. Whatever that's outside the window a few minutes ago, they had turned Subaru into this vulnerable being in his arm. Opening the umbrella with his free hand, Fuuma pulled Subaru inside the umbrella, and holding him closely.

"Saa… let's go home. I think Kotori had prepared the dinner for us."

TBC

A/N: Sorry for the long update, my computer crashed and it took quite a long time to fix it. I was also losing my will to finish the fic. It's been a difficult chapter to write, especially because Seishirou-san is here. I don't know how to write him because this is an AU fic. So I've decided to put Seishirou-san as who he is. But I won't make a bastard Seishirou, Seishirou-san is Seishirou-san *sigh*, he maybe evil but he's not a bastard.

What do you think about this chapter? Or maybe about Sei-chan? I love Sei-chan, Sei-chan is CLAMP's epitome of masculinity (I read it somewhere on the net, forgot the site…). So please review ok? And read the next chapter because this is only a half way of the story.

The last but not least, Athrun! Athrun! Athrun! Has anyone seen Gundam SEED? You have to see it!!! Athrun forever! Yay!

**MoO-mOo3-san**: Don't worry the fluffy moments is going to be here soon! ^__^

**Aikawa**** Fuuko-san: Aikawa-san, sorry there's no Kamui on this chapter but I hope Sei-chan's presence pleased you. ^o^**

**Margaret-san**: I will write that kind of 'action' again on this fic, but I'm not an expert in writing limey chapters. Wish me luck Okay? ^__^

**Fara****-san: I will. I'm sorry for the long update. ^__^**

**Cayenne-san**: Gomen for the long update! I'll update the next chapter as soon as possible. ^__^

**Sorcha****-san: Your review is the one that made wrote this chapter. Thanks for the review ^__^ I might never wrote the chapter if I hadn't got your review.  **


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: X and related characters belong to the one and only CLAMP.

**Blinded**

An X/1999 fanfiction by pluto-mint

Warnings: Shounen-ai and a little lime.

Summary: AU. X/1999 story with no the end of the world issue.

Pairings: Fuuma/Kamui/Kotori, Fuuma/Subaru, Seishirou/Subaru, etc.

Ratings: PG-13

_Sorry for the long delay minna-san!! Enjoy the chapter! ^__^_

Blinded

Chapter 6

The afternoon was bright, warm, and beautiful. It was the kind of afternoon that people would spent with their loved ones in the park, sitting together in a wooden bench, holding hands, and bathing in the golden glow flowing from the afternoon's sun. And maybe the lovers would watch how the afternoon turned into a beautiful night when the new moon shyly peeking through clear night sky. And the stars would twinkle like diamonds in the velvet blue sky. And the lovers will gaze into each other's eyes, watching how the brown irises turn into a beautiful shade of gold. And he would kiss that soft inviting lip-

"Kamui-kun!!!"

Keiichi's cheerful voice snapped Kamui from his little 'romantic dream.' "Keiichi, do you always have to be that loud?" Kamui said in a very annoyed tone. Keiichi only grinned sheepishly, scratching the back of his blonde head, "Gomen ne Kamui-kun, it's just that Satsuki-sempai would be here any minute now. If we don't finish the cleaning… well… you know her. She would probably have us cleaning the club for the rest of the year". 

"I know," Kamui sighed and returned to the wet mop, sweeping the floor. He wondered what makes him join this club, the school news paper club. It's not like that he hated the club, but their head editor can be very cruel sometimes. Everyone knows that Igarashi Satsuki was a very cold yet also a very smart girl. Keiichi said that she was able to hack any network in Japan, maybe that's why the club voted her as their leader.

"You know, it's too bad that the football club doesn't have any match right now. If they do then maybe Satsuki-sempai would watch the match and doesn't bother to check our chore today."

"I don't know that Satsuki-sempai interested in sports like football." The water splashed in to his shoes as Kamui mumbled those words. 

"She's not. But Yuuto-sempai, the captain, is her boyfriend. That's why she always watches him play". Keiichi grinned before adding, "Say, your girlfriend, Kotori-chan, is the manager of the football club is she? You know, you're really lucky that Monou-sempai is your friend, an ordinary guy like me wouldn't have the chance to be near her"

"Er… we're not lovers Keiichi".

"Liar," Keiichi snorted, "I bet you already kissed the girl."

"I'm not!!! I never… Oh just drop it Keiichi." 

Keiichi's grin turned into a mischief smile as his best friends face turned into a lovely shade of pink, "So… you're not taken yet? Or maybe you're saving yourself for Monou-sempai?"

_I'm saving my self for Fuuma?_ "Hey! What's that suppose to mean?" Now Kamui's face already turned as red as a tomato. He tried to grab Keiichi's shirt but the blonde boy was a lot faster than him. The slippery floor making him fell so ungracefully on the floor. He felt the cold watery floor under his shirt and Kamui dimly saw that Keiichi was about to jumped on him when the door slid open. 

Satsuki watched the two boys with a plain expression. "Boys, please get another room to do anything what you're about to do" Pushing her eye glasses to the bridge of her nose, Satsuki looked uninterested and rather bored with Keiichi's antics. 

"Ahahaha! Satsuki-sempai, Kamui and I were only doing the cleaning."

"Funny. I didn't see it that way." Satsuki said quietly as she walked to her desk, opened her laptop –Beast, as she often called it, and started to type. Her face was as impassive as ever when she said, "Keiichi, if you're about to help Kamui-san, you don't need to grope him like that." And Kamui was nothing but to feel kind of relieved to hear Satsuki's stern voice since Keiichi was about to jump on him (again!!).

"Oh, you're no fun Satsuki-sempai," pouted Keiichi as he lent his hand to a very red Kamui, "By the way, what's the news Satsuki-sempai?"

"I just have the news that the kendo club won the match today. Apparently Fuuma-san is way too strong for his opponent. The club would face the Sakura Gakuen kendo club in the final match".

"Monou-sempai sure is a tough one." Keiichi chirped excitedly, "Ooh… his fans would be thrilled to hear this."

Although he was still in a daze of dizziness, Kamui could hear the news clearly. Kendo. It was Fuuma's another world besides the shrine, school, Kotori, and Subaru. 

The latter one was quite a puzzle to Kamui. He didn't know how to define the nature of Fuuma and Subaru's relationship. He always thought that Subaru share the same nature of the relationship he had with Fuuma, that is the 'best friends' term. But when he saw Subaru that morning, dressed in a pair of Fuuma's worn pajamas, drank the morning coffee together with Fuuma, and talking over stuffs that Kamui only heard on the news, his whole view about their relationship had changed. Somehow he realized that Subaru had become a part of Fuuma's world. 

And there's that knot in his chest every time he thought about it. But when he saw how Fuuma would smile every time he was with Subaru, all his sadness disappeared. It's okay, because he loved to see the smile upon Fuuma's face.            

_Fuuma won the match… he must be smiling right now_, Kamui smiled with the thought of his best friend's smile. The image of Fuuma's beautiful smile played inside his mind. Too bad he's not there to see it, if it wasn't because his weekly core at the club he would have watch the match right now. 

"So Fuuma won the match ne?" A gentle smile featured Kamui's face. 

Satsuki craned her neck upon hearing Kamui's soft whisper. She'd never heard someone whispered Fuuma's name with such fondness. But now she saw a dreamy look upon Kamui's face, and she smiled secretly. "Ah… yes, Kamui-san. He won the match"

***

The usually quiet dojo now was full with people, the loud cheers could be heard from inside the dojo. But outside the dojo, stood a boy with hakama, his spiky hair plastered to his face as he poured the mineral water from its bottle to his hair. The water splashed, cooling his face with their flow. Running his fingers through his spiky hair, Fuuma sighed silently. The match was quite easy. And even though it had caused him some bruises on his arms now, he was sure that his opponent was bearing a much worse wound than his. 

Fuuma had always enjoyed his victory. But right now his victory felt so hollow. He wanted to share his victory with Kamui, he wanted Kamui to be there for him when he win the match, he wanted Kamui to hold him if he lose the match. He wanted Kamui so bad. 

For a brief moment, his eyes looked so empty. He was so absorbed on his thought; he didn't even realize that a girl had been watching him silently. A fluffy towel was suddenly thrown over his face and he turned to see Arashi beaming at him. He smiled at her; Arashi always had a way to his heart.

"You win," she tried to say it casually but the tone of her voice couldn't cover her joy. "Yeah, I won the match." He grinned at her while drying his dampened hair with the towel. "What about your match Arashi? Don't tell me that you lost the match."

Arashi was giving him a glare right now, "Hey, I'm a better swordsman than you". He laughed softly and threw the towel back at her, "Swordsman? But you're girl Arashi."

Arashi punched his arm lightly, it shouldn't be hurt but Arashi somehow hit the bruised spot, he cringed in pain, "Ouch… stop it Arashi."

"Oh my God, you're hurt," Arashi immediately tend his bruised arm and glared at him, "Why didn't you tell me about it?"

"Arashi… it's only a minor injury. There's nothing serious about it," trying to pry her hands away from his arms, Fuuma earned another glare from the long haired girl. "All the big things were started by the small ones Fuuma. Now stay, I'll get some cooling gel for your arm." Arashi dragged him to the nearest tree and pushed him to a sitting position before walking back to the dojo to get some medicine for him. Funny how a frail looking girl like Arashi could forced a grown boy like him to stay put, only by glaring at him.

Rubbing his injured arm, Fuuma sat under the tree and let out another sigh. Girls tend to do unexpected things are they? Kotori squealed a lot when she saw her favorite boy band on TV and now Arashi was giving him lots of glare only because he was having some stupid bruises. Briefly he wondered about another girl in his past… He smiled when he remembered how the girl would blush every time he gave her a shy glance. Sweet and cute.

Too bad things didn't work out between them. No matter how hard he tried or she tried to make things work between them, they just don't. Somehow all he could see is Kamui. Not her and no one else but Kamui. Only Kamui. And even though the violet eyed boy never saw him the way he wanted him to see, his eyes only lit up when he saw Kamui smile, even if the smile wasn't meant for him.

The leaves falling softly, floating in the air before it descended upon the earth. Just like the leaves, he was also falling slowly; fell into the depth of his feelings toward Kamui. Suddenly he felt tired and he closed his eyes as the evening breeze lulled him into sleep.

***

Arisugawa Sorata saw the boy that was sleeping peacefully under the tree secretly. His eyes narrowed slightly when he saw a long haired girl in hakama walking toward the boy. Jealousy rang in his ears when he saw the gentle smile upon the girl's face as she tended the boy's injured arm, ever so carefully not to wake the boy from his sleep.

He held his breath and whispered, "You should be mine Arashi…"

***

"Subaru-san… all is set and ready for tonight." Kanoe shuffled the papers in her hands, "This is the speech that you've requested."

Sitting in his usual thinking chair, Subaru watched the half moon displayed in his window and answered without looking at her, "Thank you Kanoe-san, just put the speech on my desk." 

Kanoe's slender fingers running through her long hair, licking her lips in a very seductive way, "Are you sure that you don't need anything else Subaru-san? I can give you… things… that would make you… shall we say… happy."

Subaru, still faced to the window, answered with an impassive tone, "No, thank you Kanoe-san."

Kanoe laughed, "Still playing the Ice Prince are you?" Hands on her waist, Kanoe smiled before walking to the door. Oh well, if Subaru won't play with her, some other men would. After all who could resist her charm, dressed in a very suggestive black dress and with a body that could make Venus de Milo screamed with envy, Kanoe was so very sure about it. "See you in the morning, Subaru-san."

Subaru never left his eyes from the moon. His emerald eyes held sadness and longing to the moon. 

Seishirou… 

After what happen on that rainy afternoon, Subaru was haunted by that smile, that Seishirou's smile. It's not like he's never been haunted by the images of Seishirou, but never, not even once, in his dreams he dared to imagine Seishirou smile at him. Never did he imagine a smile -his smile- that held so many… things inside of it.

Things like wants, need, and possessiveness... for him. For Subaru.

Drowned in his thought, he almost suffocated by the overwhelming truth that Seishirou will never smiled at him like that. Drawing his knees to his chest, tears started to flow silently. He was alone, alone in this dark and cold room. He wished that Hokuto was here to say soothing words in his ears. He wanted to be held by Fuuma. But right now… there's no Hokuto to comfort him. No Fuuma to hold him.

His reminders beeped and brought him back to reality; he was supposed to be at the party in 30 minutes. Still thinking about the smile, he glanced at the beeping thing before decided to rise from his seat and headed to the shower. 

And as the cold water running along his skin, Subaru wondered that maybe he should stop imagining things again, especially impossible things like that smile.   

***

By the time he finished the job, the sun was already set, making its way for the night and Kamui's body was nothing but a bundle of aching muscle. He made his way to the school gate with such effort. But when he saw Kotori's smiling face under the midst of falling leaves, all his pain suddenly wiped away from his body. Kotori's smile lit up the darkened evening and also his heart. 

"Kamui-chan…"

"Anoo… Kotori, I didn't make you wait that long am I?" He smiled at her with a weak smile. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't make you wait that long…"

"No it's okay," Kotori's soft voice echoed in his head, "I know that you're busy Kamui-chan." Kotori looked so beautiful with a smile on her face. Her golden hair was creating an illusion of halo above her head. Kotori looked like an angel. 

"Come on, Oniichan is probably waiting for me right now." Kotori took his hand and Kamui blushed when he felt Kotori's soft skin glide under his skin. Silently, he returned the touch by holding her hand. Kotori blushed when she realized what happened. Kamui was holding her hand, but this time it was different. It's not for comfort or support but it's simply because Kamui wants to. 

"I can hold your hands, can I?" Shyly peeking from his longer bangs, Kamui hid the blush on his cheek perfectly. There's an awkward silence hung between them, both of them didn't know what to do, both thinking what the other's words mean. 

He could see the pink shade adoring Kotori's beautiful face before Kotori shyly slipped her fingers to his hands, "Then… I can hold yours too, can I?

Smiling at her, Kamui gazed into her eyes and answered, "Yes, you can."

Kotori smiled back at him. Her golden hair waved and she smelled like roses and the morning dew. The night, the moon, the stars, their beauty were nothing compared to hers. The boy and the girl smiled to each other, walking together under the clear night sky. The street's light glowed, illuminating them with the soft fluorescent glow. And if the others saw the boy and the girl, they would see perfection.

***

The people clapped their hands as he finished his speech. Some people greeted him and thanked him for the donation he gave to the hospital. Their hands were every where; they're trying to reach him. It's too bright in here. It's too crowded. All the women tried to touch him or trying to make him to touch them, while all the men trying to impress him with their words. Soon Subaru started to feel the room was spinning too fast. He needed to breathe, he needed a room…

But right now he was the center of the attention, since the party was basically held for him. Apparently the hospital board wanted to thank him and showed their gratitude with this party. And now, the hospital's director was trying to introduce him with his wife, a lovely educated middle aged woman. The lady would've been a nice company if only she didn't talk that much.

And now his vision started to blur, the lady noticed this and asked him whether he needed a doctor. He smiled politely and answered that it's only a minor thing. He ushered an apology and headed to the rest room.

Subaru thanked the God in heaven when he managed to slip away from the party. Finally, he found himself a perfect spot on a park near the party hall. He sat quietly on the wooden bench. The chilly air was biting his skin, making his cheek flushed. He regretted leaving his coat in the receptionist since his white shirt couldn't prevent the cold from touching his skin. He looked up to the night sky and saw the moon emanating the soft white glow to the darkened night. Beautiful. 

Awed by the moon's mysterious beauty, Subaru never realized the presence of another man in the park. Like a tiger, the man moved slowly and gracefully toward Subaru. His eyes glinted with something that held so many secrets, secrets that were not meant to be revealed. Just like a hunter to his prey, all his senses became so sharp when Subaru was around him. He could smell the faint scent of Subaru's shampoo mixed with the scent of summer's night sky. He wondered if Subaru still tasted like strawberries… Oh well, it's nothing to be worried about since he wasn't planning on leaving without having a taste of Subaru. Seishirou smirked at thought.

"The moon is beautiful isn't it?"

The soft spoken voice woke Subaru from his little trance. 

_That voice… it can't be. _

_Seishirou!_

Trying to calm himself, Subaru dug his nails to the skin of his arms. He could hear soft foot steps making their way to him. He shivered slightly when the scent of Seishirou's after shave invading his senses. Seishirou… the man stood there clad in his usual black suit, his silver framed spectacle glinted under the moonlight. He was looking as handsome as ever with his enigmatic smile on his face. His black hair framed his perfect face, with some long bangs fell gracefully over his cheekbones. 

"It is." Seishirou smiled when he heard the slight tremble in Subaru's voice. Subaru's pale skin almost looked like porcelain under the moon's soft pearly glow. The boy rose from his seat and he saw the boy's emerald eyes glinted with something. Was it love? Or hate…? He didn't know for sure, but then again there's always that thin line between love and hate.

Seishirou noticed how Subaru had become a little taller than the last time they met; it's been five year anyway. And it's not like that he mind with the changes, Subaru still and will always be a perfect picture for him. 

He chewed the cigarette between his lips and started to reach the lighter in his pocket before Subaru offered him his lighter. A little startled by the fact that Subaru has a lighter, Seishirou smiled and asked, "Do you smoke Subaru-kun?"

The bespectacled man suddenly gripped Subaru's wrist. But Subaru pulled his hands away and watched him with a calm yet conflicting look. "I don't." Seishirou smiled enigmatically and blew the smoke to the night air, "then I take it that your boy friend is the one who smoke."

"That is none of your business." Subaru's voice falter slightly by the indifference look Seishirou gave to him. Why didn't he see any trace of something on Seishirou's face? The man didn't feel anything for him, did he? Subaru thought miserably. He wanted to run away again but his knees had become so weak when Seishirou suddenly leaned closer and touched his face. His calloused fingers traced along the jaw line and stopped at his chin before they lifted his face so that Seishirou's breaths mingled with his.

"I saw you and I know that you saw me too. You had a good taste Subaru," Seishirou whispered between their lips. Subaru's legs turned to jelly when he felt the older man's warm breath before his lips as he whispered those words. All his walls had melted and he wanted to avoid the taller man's gaze because he didn't want Seishirou to see the weakness in him. But Subaru was unable to fight the hand that was holding his face, because the truth was he wanted Seishirou's touch so bad. 

"Seishirou-san…" That was the only coherent words he could say.  

Seishirou only smirked and answered the words by descending his lips upon Subaru's lips in a kiss. It was not a gentle kiss; it was a fierce demanding kiss. Biting Subaru's bottom lips, demanding an entrance, Seishirou slipped his tongue into Subaru's mouth. Tasting the smaller boy by touching every side of his mouth, Seishirou could taste a faint strawberry sweetness mixed the bitter taste of coffee.

Subaru, on the other hand, was too stunned with the act. The lips over his, the tongue in his mouth, the hand on his face, they were all Seishirou's. He was kissing him. He could taste Seishirou in every place of his mouth. His black hair shone under the bright light coming from the lightings on the park and they were making an illusion of a black halo over his head. Panting slightly from the kiss, Subaru croaked, "Why?"

"I want you."

_What??_ Subaru had a trouble in processing the words. 

"I want you, I don't care if you're taken or not. I will have you because I want you." A smile graced Seishirou's face. He was pleased to see Subaru's response. 

The boy hung his head low, his heart pounding so hard. Seishirou wanted him. Wanted him, but not wanting him fully as he is. But all that he could see on his eyes were only lust. Seishirou never loved him and now he lusted over Subaru. It's wrong, because Subaru had always loved him and wanting to be loved in return. It's wrong, because Seishirou never loved him and now he only wanted his body. It's so wrong. He didn't want to be played again. 

"What about me? What about my feelings?" Subaru's weak voice was demanding an answer. Inhaling the cigarette slowly, Seishirou smirked and answered the question, "What is it with your feelings? I thought you already knew the answer."

"So you don't care about me." Subaru's body shaken with anger, bitterness, sadness, despair, and, to his horror, also by the joy he felt because Seishirou wanted him. He pushed Seishirou away with his hands. But Seishirou only smirked and kissed him again, "I thought you already know that Subaru-kun."

Subaru felt the sting on the corner of his eyes and whispered weakly, "Then go, just go…" He didn't want Seishirou to see him cry.

Turned his back from the angry boy, Seishirou tossed his cigarette and smiled to the boy, "I will have you Subaru, until then… try to remember my words that you are mine." The man walked away from the boy and lost in to the darkness of the night.

Subaru fell to his knees when Seishirou finally faded from his view. "Why?"

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Why?"

Wrapping his arms around his shaky body, heart broken and shattered, Subaru tried to be strong, he tried not to cry. A silent tear was falling softly from his eyes. 

And the moon suddenly looked so gray for him.

TBC

A/N: Yep, Seishirou is EVIL!!! 

Minna-san, I apologize for the long update. I've been quite busy lately… Doing some papers, experiments, and stuffs like that. I hope this chapter delight you! ^__^ 

Someone told me that I'm good at writing fluff so that's why you'll find some fluffy scenes on the next chapter. As for the story, the next chapter will feature a certain couple's (sort of) first date. And no, it's not A Kamui/Kotori date. So just wait for the next chapter.

And by the way… I am looking for a beta reader, many people told me to find one. Anyone interested? Just send me an email if you're interested! ^__^

The last but not least, Athrun! Athrun! Athrun! I've write a Gundam Seed Fanfiction, if you want to read it then it's on Gundam UC section. I love that boy!!!

**Dementia-12 san**: Thank you!! They do look kawaii, don't they? ^__^

**SapphireDragon-san**: No I'm not going to stop the story, but I just need some times to write it down. ^__^

**??????-san**: Ahahaha! Thank you! ^__^

**yamatoforever-san**: Nah, that don't bother me at all. I'm glad to have you back on the review list! ^__^

**Saria-san**: Oooh you're back! Thank you!! ^__^

**Aikawa Fuuko-san**: You always review the fic!! Thank you. I'm glad that Seishirou-san pleased you. ^__^

**Ephocalypse-san**: Thank you for the compliment. As for the beta reader part, you are right about it. I do need one. Thanks anyway! ^__^

**Aria Marier-san**: Thank you!! You're the first one to say that to me.

**Chris pwure-san**: I'm glad that you like him. Thank you!! ^__^ 


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